my life such a paradoks

I don't know what happen with my life recently, actually everything seems like out of control. This all mess start from this summer, I spend my summer holiday with terrible and mixed feeling and when I thought everything was gonna be okay but I was wrong, things still goes on quite bad even when summer over. Things still goes wrong without I don't know the reason why and why they did this to me. Why they betrayed me? Fall is coming and maybe one of my wish come true, the another one I was believe also betrayed me. ET TU BRUTE? maybe this last word from Julius Caesar like Shakespeare said as English quote meaning even you, brute? as unexpected betrayal from friends. But who want living a life with fake friends. I feel sad but relief at same time. Summer was end and fall is coming. Goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend you have been the one, you have been the one for me. YES I PUT IT ON PAST TENSE.

we're all screwed up. are we?

what i wore : 

blue pattern top by H&M

blue skirt by Forever 21

braided crystal bracelet by Forever 21

black backpack by Kate Spade

people are such liars. they tell you they're fine, while the truth is they're not and miserable inside

i can't believe i back to writing blog again. it's been a while and i miss this baby blog. yes i'm missing being blogger. hahaha. isn't easy to back on these thing since the last post is about him the one i love. yes i still put on present tense, if only i could do this shit easily, being move on. moving on is living. being grown up is suck and struggle is real. but maybe like i always said maybe we're just not meant to be. our timed out and i once upon a time i were his firework having the sparkle and then gone. sad but truth. FUCK. i hate writing about this heart break yet not so move on phase. yes i still struggle to get over him and trying to living my best life and this shit. oh my God i hate this phase, please give me a new worth to love new boyfriend hahahaha

september

i hate write this post. but we should face our fear right. yes. we had fight. september was adorable month but somehow relationship didn't work as well as we wished. so here we are trying to kill each other. nevermind. we should move on. thank you for amazing almost three months we spend together. i super love that memories. hahaha. i write this post and still thinking about you. i won't denied i miss us.

superhero

 

jayus si tapi cukup bikin aku senyum senyum sendiri.

him : give me three name of your favorite superhero

me  : batman. superman. and.... sailormoon

him : no. no. no. i'm your man. 

duh kok sailormoon si jawaban km yg terakhir masa NO. NO. NO i'm your moon

me  : HUAKAKAKA. unpredictable me

you're so annoying

sometimes we laugh and had good time together. but most of these we try to kill each other. iya. hidup kadang memang selucu itu.

you know how it's feel

god and monster

literally. can i be your baby ?
song lyric from God and Monster by Lana del Rey

gracias cha

Oups. I almost forget to upload this picture. Ini oleh oleh dari CHA yang abis liburan dari Kuala Lumpur hahahaha. Thank you cha uda rela bawain berat berat. Super happy

sweet dream sweetie

I could not be good player. I quit. Enjoy your game. Goodbye sweetheart.

the one that got away

In another life. I would be your girl
We'd keep all our promises be us against the world

In another life. I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away

-- The one that got away ~ by : Katy Perry --

ps : thank you for coming again. thank you for proving you're not liar. but. i don't love you. i don't trust you like i did yesterday. but. yes. i still love you. little bit. maybe. in another life. sorry.

hypnotized by your destiny

 

It's hard to don't give a fuck if you still care of him. But I don't know how to keep stand for what I choose to believing. Yeah I'm tired of all these shit. Somehow everything just falling apart.

learning to fall

 

I don't have any idea since the last love story were fucked up. I was dying more than half year and loss almost 10pounds. Nothing to do here *sigh

before you leave

 

Suara kamu beda. Gak kaya biasanya. Maksud kamu? Iya beda gk keliatan logat Jawa nya. Bagus si hehehe

we found love in hopeless place

 

It’'s the way I'’m feeling

I just can’t deny

But I've gotta let it go

We found love in a hopeless place

Shine a light through an open door

Love and life I will divide

Turn away cause I need you more

Feel the heartbeat in my mind

-- We found love ~ by : Rihanna ---

miss you or not

I can't deny if sometimes I miss you who already move on with your life. hahaha. Sound nay, right?! Ah. ya sudalah. I wish nothing but the best for you.

birthday wish

 

They said : be careful of your wish. And few days before my birthday I wish. okay. just wish for a sec. Maybe it would be fun if someone from Jakarta coming to celebrate my birthday and said to them yes I'm here to celebrate her birthday. kyaaa!! hahahaha. Just stupid wish I guess. But. I really don't have any idea when now he sit in front of me. Some friends who know him always wondering what he's fuckin' doing here? I don't know exactly what you thought but I really love wasting time with you. Thank you for coming abang abal abal :')

 

live fast - die pretty

Live Fast -- Die Pretty. Mereka bilang life is short jadi please forgive quickly. uuh. Iya aku uda bilang aku uda maap-in kamu. Your name still on my daily prayer tapi kalo inget inget kok tetep aja pengen ngamuk ya hahahaha. Sebel gimana gitu tapi ya sudalah. I try not to care anymore. By the way I get back my passion lately. yeah. even just a bit. Better time management :)

sun to shine

I hope for God sake. You're worth it

it's magic

It's magic. you know
Never believe. it's not so
Never been awake

Never seen a day break
Leaning on my pillow in the morning
Lazy day in bed
Music in my head
Crazy music playing in the morning light

-- Magic ~ by : PILOT --

Currently in love with this song. Actually this is jingle of Yamaha Mio J 2012. hihihi. This song is magic. Okay maap kalo sedikit alay tapi saya suka lagu Yamaha mungkin juga soalnya ini jingle Yamaha dan showroom Yamaha BCS punya Novi-pelit-tapi-cakeph-bikin-tergila-gila yg semakin di depan itu memang enak si lagunya. Cek di youtube gih! hahahaha

lovely valentine

Apa itu CINTA ?!
Unyil punya cewe tapi sekarang dia malah mulai melirik sahabat cewenya. Unyil bilang : ini cinta keliru. Jelly belum punya cewe tapi dia mencintai cewe yang uda punya cowo tetapi sayangnya cewe itu tetap memilih kekasihnya bukan dia. Jelly bilang : ini cinta cenat cenut. Aku?! aku (masih saja dengan bodohnya) mencintainya tapi dia mencintai yg lain. Aku bilang : love is biatch! hahaha. No hard feeling but I miss him a lot and there's nothing I can do
Happy Valentine ♥